7 Psychological Tricks to Make People Value You More

Do you feel like your opinions and ideas don’t get the respect they deserve? Do you wish you had more influence over others in your family, social circles or workplace? 

Learning simple but science-backed psychological techniques can help you come across as more authoritative and compelling to people. In this guide, we’ll be unpacking 7 powerful mental shortcuts you can ethically leverage to make people assign more weight and importance to your words.

Let’s dive in.

1: Appear Disinterested

Here’s a little known fact about human nature – we yearn and chase whatever appears distant or tough to obtain. Researchers have extensively studied the psychological reactance theory which shows that people resist and defiantly do the opposite if they feel their choices are being restricted or coerced unfairly.  

This manifests clearly in relationships and friendship/romantic pursuits. Have you noticed the more desperately you chase someone, the more they pull away? 

But when you appear selectively detached, unmoved and occupied with other priorities, their natural reactance makes them find you more attractive and alluring. 

Apply this tip by reducing your overall availability and not always being present at everyone’s beck and call. Prioritize other important tasks even while interacting. And watch people find you mysteriously more valuable and magnetic.

2: Keep Some Things Scarcely Available

You must have noticed how exclusivity and limited availability generates insane hype and interest around products drops, concerts or pop-up restaurants. Ever wondered why? Behavioral economics offers clues.

Studies show that people intuitively assign more worth to anything that’s rare or scarcely available to acquire. It triggers an innate reaction making us desperately covet something we can’t have easily. We start judging the quality by its current availability.

Use this quirk of perception by keeping some emotions, compliments or timeslots reserved only for selective people in your life. Don’t be perpetually available to everyone or it will erode your perceived value. Set healthy boundaries and turn down unreasonable demands or favors. Watch your personal brand skyrocket.

3: Offer Occasional, Give Small Favours

Here’s an astonishing finding – researchers studied over 1.1 million restaurant bills to analyze the impact of small favors on tipping amounts. 

Waiters who gave something extra like candy, dessert or snacks along with the check received tips that were up to 20-40% higher! Even small talk helped.

This demonstrates a powerful social norm – reciprocity. When you do something good for others out of goodwill, they feel obligated to value and repay you in some form too. Of course, ensure it’s occasional and in proportion to preserve genuine helpfulness instead of fake manipulation. Find the optimal balance and sweet spot.  

4: Confidently Admit Ignorance 

Surveys show a staggering 80% of people rate themselves as above average drivers when only 10-20% actually are. Humans hate conceding ignorance. 

We posture, deflect and project false confidence instead of accepting we don’t know enough. This destroys credibility.

If you want people to truly value your knowledge and wisdom, practice humility. Don’t be afraid to transparently acknowledge you’re continuously learning when you lack deep expertise on a topic. Explain you don’t have enough information to form an informed opinion yet. This builds enormous authenticity.  

Later, when you do express your thoughtful viewpoints, people will assign much more weight having witnessed your honesty firsthand. Admitting ignorance earns you the right to be believed when you speak up.

5: Secure Small Commitments First

Here’s an intriguing fact on human behavior – when people make even a minor commitment or agree to a small initial request, they stand by it strongly. Instead of rationally evaluating right/wrong, they get busy defending their consistency to avoid seeing themselves as fickle.  

Use this quirk strategically. In relationships and collaborations, see if you can get someone to do a very quick harmless favor in the beginning without thinking. 

When you later make bigger requests, they’ll be much more likely to comply because they feel obligated to remain consistent with their earlier willingness. They don’t want to be perceived as unreliable.

Build compliance progressively. Start with smaller asks before moving to bigger commitments. Of course don’t manipulate excessively. Find the ethical balance.

6: Provide Social Proof and Validation 

We humans are wired to be social creatures. If enough people around us appear to value something, we instinctively assume it must deserve our attention too even without any first hand experience. Scientists call these mental shortcuts social proof and social validation.

Smart coaches and leaders strategically showcase how many others benefitted from their advice to attract new clients. 

Companies highlight reviews, testimonials and popularity indicators to boost conversions. Stand up comedians and shows use laugh tracks to fuel herd mentality making jokes seem funnier. 

You too can ethically leverage social proof instead of directly bragging about your awesomeness. Casually showcase how others admire your insightfulness, knowledge or generosity. The credibility lent by third party validation can work wonders.

7: Frame Tasks as Exciting Challenges

Here’s a golden technique used by shrewd coaches, trainers and business leaders – frame tasks and objectives as almost impossible challenges that will test people’s limits instead of mundane goals. 

Studies show that casting goals as exciting tests of ability ignites motivation, grit and determination to succeed because people deeply crave validating themselves capable of conquering audacious challenges.  

Savvy leaders daringly declare that most people would likely fail at the goal but they see a spark in their team that might help them defy the odds. This makes people value and rally around such leaders much more eagerly due to the vote of confidence.

The Next Steps

There you have it – 7 psychology backed tricks derived from extensive research that can profoundly transform how people perceive you in any domain. 

Apply them judiciously without manipulation and soon you’ll notice people tuning in far more attentively whenever you communicate. 

Of course, these techniques simply act as credibility boosters to complement your actual substance and value-add. If used as standalone tactics without internal work, you may attract initial interest but won’t sustain genuine respect long term. 

Only by combining external influence with internal transformation can you earn admiration that endures. There are no quick fixes, but a few simple tweaks applied positively can surely amplify your impact multi-fold.